I recently had two things in my life come to an end sooner than I expected. This has caused me some sadness. I usually like to give myself time to adjust to an ending. The closing of a chapter.
The first of the two happened a few weeks ago now. Moppets. I had been gearing up for next year and was feeling good about the things I could accomplish this summer, especially since after doing it for 2 years, I had a better idea what I needed to do this summer! So how did this end before I expected? A leak. I found out at our last meeting that the group is changing days next year, but they hadn't announced it yet. I specifically worked my work schedule out when I took my job to have Monday's off to continue with Moppets. Monday's are my only day off, so by switching the days I could no longer do Moppets. I have been in a funk over this ever since. Mr. T pointed this out last night. I guess it's not that I wasn't prepared to end at all, I had contemplated not doing it this year and then committed to another year, but the shock of gearing up for something that ---poof---went away is what is causing the funk (or after shock) in this case. I will miss Moppets, but it's time for me to move on, I hope I can do this now.
The second wasn't as big of a shock, but still odd. Today was my last day watching my children's best friends. I am picking up more hours and more children with the other people I work for this summer and all involved agreed that I would have my hands full without the additional children. The oddness to this was that I had told their dad that the last week of school would be the last week I watched them. It wasn't until he called me at 3 this afternoon and asked if he could take me and the kids out for a treat to say thank you that I found out today was their last day and that they would be home with him tomorrow. My kids have mixed feelings. Meaning Little dash will miss his play mate while little T will appreciate some space from hers (they are having some differing views on life at the moment.) Anyway, long story short---poof---they were gone.
So as each of these chapters close and next week begins our new routine of me trying to keep 7 kids happy ages ranging from 2 to 10, I will fill my time up and adjust to having my home back and not having kids here. I'll probably finally go through the Moppets stuff I have so I can return things to the Mops group and life will continue. So I guess this is my official closure moment to say Goodbye and so long to the chapters that have closed and hello to tomorrow.
4 comments:
Change is hard;especially if it happens abruptly. I have heard that it is good to embrace it. Must be therapeutic. I hope this blog has given you some closure.
Believe it or not...I left the school on Monday (their last day) with my eyes watering. I was going to miss the boys' teachers. We had Mrs. O for both years of Kindergarten...and we had Mrs. N for one year, but she is pregnant, and will be gone for maternity leave in the fall. I think it was hard on me because when I dropped off their thank-you gifts, they weren't in their rooms and I didn't get to verbally tell them THANKS! And their rooms looked so empty and ghost-like. Hoo boy...where are my hankies...LOL!
This really shows that the precious days are the normal days in the middle. I try to realize this as days fly by. Many times I have been taken off-guard by the abrubt-unceremonial end of something. I remember graduating from high-school and and a girl I sat by in many classes for many years said that the saddest part of graduating was not seeing people on a casual basis like me ever again. It was true. I've never saw her again.
It's harder when you don't have a chance to prepare or think about the ending. Having it scooped out from under you is sort of anti-climactic. I'm not good at change in my head I think I am and then I notice even changing bedspreads takes me a week or more to decide I actually like the new one. We hold on to the familiar - who knows the what could come next that could be fantastic?!
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